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Last updateMon, 13 Nov 2017 4am

Ten Habits of Highly Successful Indian Liberal Intellectuals

Ten Habits of Highly Successful

1) Every time you come across an article, blog post or anything that has the word ‘Hindu’ in it, describe the post as ‘vile and disgusting’, regardless of the actual context. Express your hatred for Hinduism constantly and diligently, in ways that can be subtle or obvious depending upon the context. However, do not forget to mention in the same breath that you ‘respect’ Hindus.

2) Always ask, ‘But but but, what about 2002?’ in any TV panel discussion, even if the topic of discussion is about the sexual life of the Gorillas of upper Congo. Remember the golden rule. All communal riots are equal, but 2002 riots are more equal than others.

3) Write a blog about Modi. Make liberal use of words like ‘vile monster’, ‘butcher’, ‘autocrat,’ ‘Nazi,’ ‘Hiter,’  ‘kristalnacht’ and ‘1933’.  Attend anti-Modi seminars at the India International Centre and talk passionately about ‘malnutrition in Gujarat’ over a laden plate of canapés and glasses of free champagne.

4) Occasionally, throw a scrap of carefully constructed praise at the ’ tolerant spirit of secular Hindus’ and pander to their egos. This is very essential if you want to present yourself as a ‘liberal humanist’.

5) Learn to do nimble spiritual somersaults depending upon the context. Sometimes, you might refer to yourself as an agnostic, at other times, you can call yourself an atheist, but always mention that you are ‘spiritual, not religious’ – whatever that means!

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Why I am scared of liberals

Legendary newsman Walter Cronkite once said “I think being a liberal, in the true sense, is being non-doctrinaire, non-dogmatic, non-committed to a cause – but examining each case on its merits.” And that was the kind of liberalism I fell in love with during my college days. Twenty odd years later, I have managed to take positions on various issues facing our society today, and almost without exception, I have found myself at odds with those who call themselves liberals. I have steadily moved from identifying myself as liberal to being alarmed at some of their stands, to complete disillusionment relatively rapidly in the last five years or so.

At this moment, I am terrified of liberals.

Two clarifications before we start in earnest if that’s all right with you. One, it is not the scope of this article to debate whether the people I am talking about are liberals in the true sense of the term. Whether you like it or not, but the space belonging to the liberals on the spectrum of discourse is taken up by a group that has exhibited certain inconsistencies time and again and it is that group that I will be referring to in my article. As most of these liberals also identify with the leftist politics, I feel the terms liberals and left liberals can be used interchangeably.

Here, then is a short list of reasons why I as an ordinary citizen of India, am terrified of the liberal movement across the world.

Liberals have no absolute stand on any issue

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Britain betrays its Hindus, Jains and Sikhs

Britain betrays its Hindus

Britain’s Hindus, Sikhs and Jains, its peaceful Dharmic communities, are faced with the worst historic setback they have ever suffered on British soil. The threat of anti-caste judicial activism in Britain and the wider world beyond is now almost certain to become a dreaded reality. Predictably, the incumbent Conservative government, which had pretended sympathy over the threat of an ill-conceived anti caste law for electoral reasons, is readying to betray them. And what it has done, in usual inimitable style, is to create a smokescreen to mislead the affected communities with a false sense of security. It has initiated a sham consultation to review the desirability of such legal provisions against alleged caste discrimination. But behind the scenes the government and its agents are engaged in a sordid approach to community leaders in order to persuade them to accept a legal regime that would be profoundly detrimental to the interests of the community.

The consultation document is so shoddily crafted it implies a lack of respect for the affected communities. It contains casual inconsistencies and missteps. Worst of all, the government seems to have reached a decision already on what the outcome of the consultation will be, in advance of it. It bespeaks withering disregard for people of Indian origin while British ministers serenade gullible Indians about the merits of free trade with the UK. The consultation document artificially differentiates two aspects of the singular assault against Dharmic communities as supposed alternatives. The first is legislative sanction to create a civil offence of caste discrimination. The second is to allow the courts to continue deciding, as they are already doing, alleged caste discrimination complaints by covering them under existing provisions on racial bigotry.

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